I am so depending. I am so lonely, and I think a beautiful boy will come along and save me from my old ways. This is my problem. No one will save me, and love is just like keys or a lipstick. You will never find it if you’re looking for it. Stop depending. Start to be your own boyfriend. You know who can make you happiest? You. 

Sometimes I wonder what all this writing brings. I write, and I write, but all remains. Everything is still the same. Everything is hopeless. I am broken and I don’t have power anymore. I am not even sad, I just feel nothing, and this is the most horrible feeling. Now I realize: It is such a bless to feel anything at all. I wish I had a broken heart or grief or euphoria; everything is better than this emptiness. 

I am dead.

Posted 10 months ago with 0 notes